5 reasons why smartphones are not the answer to your child’s boredom!

Okay so since you are reading this, you are either a parent really concerned about the increasing screen time in your child’s life or you are a parent who feels I am totally bonkers and handing out impractical advice. Either ways, this article is for you!

First things first- I AM NOT A PERFECT PARENT OR EVEN CLAIM TO BE ONE! I am just a regular mom who survives on a few screams, daily soaps and lots of coffee to get through the day. I only write on things that I feel strongly about and this I just had to pen down, especially after attending a party where 6 adults laughed their lungs out talking and pulling each other’s legs and 4 kids had their heads buried into smartphones while 1 kid sulked away(mine, of course).

I wish I could hold a placard saying ‘BAD IDEA’ up and shove it in the face of all who say they give their children mobiles only when they are bored but no! I am an advocate of ‘no judging parenting’ so I will do the rational thing- I will explain my opinion. Here are my 5 reasons why smartphones cannot and SHOULD NOT be the answer to your child’s boredom:

1. Boredom is actually good for your child. 

A couple of weeks ago, my 9 year old came to me, with a grumpy face and folded arms, ‘Mumma, I am bored!’

‘Good!’ was my reply, ‘Go find something to do.’

She looked at me as if I were half crazy and went to her room, threw a few things around, bickered to her stuff toys and then settled down to write a story. Although I find an uncanny similarity between the villian of the story and myself, I was quite pleased with the outcome. Boredom initiates imagination and creativity. It is like pranayama for the mind- it exercises the brain yet relaxes it.

You and the gadget filled world we live in are not responsible for your child’s entertainment all the time. Let her be self sufficient!

2. Social media knowledge-10/10

Social skills- Zero

For those who say that games make children smarter, I say ‘Okay, maybe they do but do they make them better humans too?’ E.Q. is as important as I.Q. Can children sitting together, in perennially hunched up postures, gazing unblinkingly into their smartphone screens, learn how to read emotions on the face of another child sitting next to them? When a child touches your feet in respect but does not look up from the screen while doing so, do you appreciate his meticulous skills to multitask or do you wonder if he actually cares? Playing together, talking, fighting and even ganging up against parents to pull pranks are the things that keep the spark of childhood alive. Why not encourage them instead of letting the socials skill muscle of your child undergo disuse atrophy?

3. A smartphone cannot parent your child.

‘I wish I could give her something that kept her busy enough to at least let me finish one thing’, we all say a zillion times. A smartphone seems like the perfect solution. But then again….

….If you hand your child the smartphone every time she is upset, pause and think- what are you teaching her? Ever heard of conditioned response? Do you want her to relate to the smartphone as a solace? Maybe you don’t do that, maybe you just dish it out when she throws an inconsolable tantrum or cries incessantly for it which although I agree is the easy way out when you have had a long day or are sitting in a restaurant surrounded by judging eyes or many similar situations. Your child is even probably going to say, ‘Mommy is the best’ but are you really doing what is the best for her? Unfortunately you don’t get things in life by whining or stomping your feet in rage. Isn’t childhood the right time to understand that so that your child can face the real world when the time comes?

4. Mental health matters too!

Sadly, children today are just as stressed as we adults are. Blame it on the fast paced lives, the over exposure due to technology, increasing peer pressure and material attachments. Research has proven that depression and anxiety in teens has gone up exponentially over the past decade. While smartphone gaming may sound like a great place to unwind and vent out pent up frustrations, it is not so. Games and smartphones are not altogether wrong for kids. The problem lies in the fact that it is very easy for children to get addicted to them and they are not able to appreciate the fine line where it becomes too much for their health. You can’t keep a chocolate in front of your child and tell her to only eat a piece a day. Scientists and doctors have equated addiction to games like PUBG and Fortnite to drug addiction and I heard a neuropsychiatrist say the other day that whilst the addictions are so similar, the gaming addiction appears to be more dangerous as we do not even have de-addiction centres to cure them.

5. Bill Gates and Steve Jobs agree!

Well, if nothing I have written has appealed to you , may be this will. The technology stalwarts of our century, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs have revealed in their interviews that they limit technology at their homes for their children. Mark Zuckerberg, in an open letter to his daughters, asked them to step out and experience life. ”You will be busy when you are older, so I hope you take time to smell all the flowers and put all the leaves you want in your bucket now”.

I rest my case. As I said earlier, this is my opinion, not my advice. May better sense prevail and may we be able to raise a generation of better and kind hearted humans and not hunchbacked cyborgs!