Through the eyes of an alien-Planet Earth!

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                                           Project Earth-Final Report


I hail the Great Zishaw-the life force of our planet X4F1 and submit before you the final report of my mission-Project Earth. It has been an honour to have been chosen for the project. Since the time we discovered the existence of life on another planet called Earth, it has been an issue of prime importance to know and understand more about it.  Though it was very difficult to study the planet without physically entering it, I tried my level best to gather as much information as possible from some reliable sources.

Source of information
I attempted contact with a ‘teen’ i.e. a young one of the human species through what is popularly known as internet on Earth-it is a primitive system of communication still in use on the planet which goes to show that the Earthlings are technologically not very advanced. I also discovered that the species does not possess the emotion of trust. I told the young homo sapien that I am from another planet but he refused to believe. Moreover, he insisted on calling the conversation a chat. Wonder what that means.
I asked him the best source of information available about everything and he said-‘TV Ads of course!’
‘Where do they live?’ I asked. He was quite amused at the question and said,’You don’t seem too good in English. You mean where can you watch them? You can find them all on Google.’
I must have said something wrong and therefore not wanting to raise suspicion, I broke contact. I had the name of the most authentic source-ads.

Study sample
A territory on Earth known as India.
I chose this particular one as the young one told me that India is the place with the most diverse cultures and people and therefore made an ideal sample to study Earth.

Method
I typed Google and what seemed like an electronic dictionary opened up in front of me. The word ‘ads’ led to YouTube-the name is misleading. It is actually a compilation of all relevant information available with humans in the form of moving visual images and some are called ‘ads’ or ‘advertisements’.
I learnt a lot,thanks to ‘ads’, though I do not understand why something that is so important is not safeguarded and is so easily accessible?

Significant findings

The predominant species on the planet Earth is the homo sapiens, the common name being humans. Everything on Earth is primarily about this race. There are two genders in humans-male and female.

The Mating Game
The males are avidly pursuing the other sex and that seems to be the sole purpose of their lives.
The factors deciding mating success are many, the most significant being a highly aphrodisiac spray known as ‘deodorant’ . It almost magically makes the male tremendously attractive to a number of females who can’t get their hands off him. It appeals to the sense of smell from afar and the efficiency is directly proportional to the amount of spray being applied. I knew I would not be trusted on this one so I have added a clip of the same for you to see it for yourself.

I strongly recommend that we send a secret mission to Earth to procure the magic potion.

There are two schools of thought on Earth regarding the discipline of mating. One is a literature called Kaamsutra while the other is a product of plant life-Aamsutra. The latter is the latest version I presume and is turning the tables on the mating game. The fruit ‘aam’ seems to turn on women to the extent that they initiate foreplay just at the sight or touch of it. It must have taken centuries for the development of such a product and it is highly commendable.